Thursday, January 27, 2011

Suede shoes, spray paint and rock n' roll

This dream was pretty weird and had a few parts that didn't link together, but it had its funny moments.

I was visiting my friend Maritza, who lived on a strange plot of land that was part grass and part dirt lot. It had a number of small buildings on it that looked sort of abandon. I think it was some sort of commune or trailer park situation because people lived there, but it was extremely run down. Maritza had a little building where she lived and it was just a concrete square, but it had a full kitchen/living room/bedroom in it was very cute inside.


She showed me a pair of purple suede ankle boots with black and white stripes on the side that she had just bought on sale - she said they were originally worth $1100.00. I tried them on and they made my legs bend backwards at the knee like an ostrich. Maritza prepared a small plate of cold pizza squares and sprinkled black pepper over them. She told me to deliver them to an old man who lived across the lot, because he needed food plus he wanted to see Maritza's new shoes. So I delivered the pizza squares but came back right away because the grass was wet and I was afraid of ruining the shoes.

Kinda like this, but the stripes were black
and white and more horizontal


I changed shoes and we decided to go over to a rickety train-car/trailer looking thing that was across the field. It had yellow light spilling from the cracks and loud music was coming from inside. We went inside and there were a bunch of drunk people discussing how to turn the trailer into an art gallery. They were deliberating over the name they would call it, "Versailles" or "The Stop." We were sitting on two mangy old couches facing each other that had just enough room between them for someone to walk. A lady brought a kid with a big red afro into the trailer and we were like "he's too young to hang out in here!" but the lady insisted he would just fall asleep, and he curled up under a blanket on my lap and did.


The last part involved me having a job spray painting the heads of underground sprinkler heads bright yellow. I would lay on a skateboard on my stomach and ride down Ford Parkway in St. Paul, spraying them as a rolled by. There was a gang of teenage boys following me and trying to beat me up because I had caught them doing a crime and got them in trouble a few months before.


There was another vague part about me doing a bunch of psychedelic drugs and starting a band with three other people. I played the bass and the violin and I also sang, but a random girl we knew sat in on practice when I couldn't and the band decided to keep her as the singer, though I was still on bass and violin. This sort of pissed me off, but not really because our band had only two practices together and I knew I couldn't remember any of the songs, even though they were all cover songs. I remember thinking that the whole thing was ridiculous because we were all on drugs.


We were slated to play a big outdoor amphitheater and it was completely packed. We got on stage and I realized I didn't know how to play any of the songs and thought "okay, just pretend, you're only the bass player, know one will know." But before we started playing the girl singer said something to the effect of "Before we begin, I'd like to give a little shout out to Kate Iverson, who is one of the ugliest people I know" and then a jumbotron flashed to me and started flashing to other ugly people in the crowd who were laughing but I thought it was super mean. Then the camera flashed back to me and in real life I was covering my face with my hands and looking outraged, but the jumbotron showed me smiling really big and playing a little ditty on my violin, like a dork. I then stormed off the stage and that's all I can remember.

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Summer Love with Mikhail Baryshnikov

This dream sort of started off like a Lifetime made for TV movie. It involved me (for some reason I was Bridget Fonda) spending a summer on a lake in a flashback sequence, meeting Mikhail Baryshnikov and having a whirl-wind romance in which we tied each other up back-to-back with bright yellow rope and would go walking around the lakeshore, tied together, doing weird gymnastics moves like kartwheels and handstands and back flips.


The dream fast forwarded to me being older, having been married, divorced and having a daughter named "Kelli" who was now 18 or so. I brought her and her boyfriend to the same lake for a vacation and we were riding in a row boat on the lake, as were many other people. We came into a little lagoon-type area and my daughter fell out of the boat and we fished her out. She said "Ouch! I think I was just stung by a stingray!" I didn't believe it at first because it was a freshwater lake, but when we looked over the side of the boat there were hundreds of small stingrays the size of sandwiches swimming around in the lake.


We got to shore and my daughter started getting really sick. Mikhail Baryshnikov was there and swept us all into his SUV and brought us to the hospital, saying she only had "minutes to live." We dropped her and her boyfriend off and Mikhail brought me back to his fancy house. I asked him "Do you remember me?" and he said "How could I ever forget." He had a daughter about the same age as mine and she was dismantling a red sign that said "Kelley" (our daughters had the same name, but spelled differently) and somehow she got the sign to read "Kelli." She declared she was bringing it to the hospital to liven up my daughter's hospital room.


Mikhail randomly brought me into town for some sort of big annual event that was going on. It involved a pack of about 20 gorillas in a pen, who were all shaking and tearing apart big white pillows. There was a team of high school football players outside of the pen egging the gorillas on and daring them to grab them and throw them as far as they could. The gorillas would grab a football player and hurl him into the street. The point was to see which player could get thrown the furthest.


The scene morphed to a conference room/cafeteria where Mikhail was debuting some sort of power point presentation he was really excited about. The only thing I could pay attention to, however, were two oval mirrors that were laid down on the counter by the cafeteria's register that had deer antlers attached to them. I kept wondering if they were going to throw them out and if I could keep them.


There was another random part about going through a Burger King drive through to get a "Transparent Hamburger" which was a bun with mayo, a whole bunch of shredded lettuce, ripped up pieces of bacon, and a hamburger pattie the size of a 50 cent piece. I didn't understand what was "transparent" about it, but I ordered two, and all the lettuce fell all over me. And that's when I woke up.