Friday, December 2, 2011

Nerd Games and Naked Lunches

I was running a rental event at on of our galleries that had Wild Turkey Whiskey as a sponsor. The event involved a bunch of sci-fi nerds doing a video shoot of a game that was all about buying presents for people. I was being a jerk and drinking straight vodka on the rocks, hanging out with my friend Robyne, making fun of the nerds and stealing cases of their whiskey.


Somehow my Dad was there and he was helping the nerds organize their shoot for the game. The game went like this: You were given a piece of paper with a dozens of random things hand-written on it that the other person apparently liked, and you were supposed to look at the very last thing on the list and find a photo of it in hundreds of other images that were placed on the floor of the gallery. I got my Dad's list and the last thing on it was "Biggie Smalls" so I found the picture of Biggie Smalls wearing a crown and turned it over. There were all sorts of items based on Biggie that you could buy, but they were generically manufactured by one company, like mugs with his face on it, ceramic picture frames that said "Biggie" at the top, etc.


My Dad got my list and apparently the last thing on my list was "Curly Hair" he found a picture of a girl with curly hair and ended up buying me a weird curling iron that seemed like it was from an informercial, it was pink and looked like a big, long plastic stick made out of mesh and it didn't get hot, you were supposed to clamp it onto a lock of your hair and let it sit for 3-5 minutes and it would somehow hold the curl until you washed your hair.


We left the gallery and took a bus home. I hadn't bought my Dad anything Biggie Smalls-related so my sisters (I had multiple sisters in the dream) were all harping on me about it saying everything was only $15, how could I be so cheap, but in the dream I was a teenager and didn't have any money so I explained I would have had to ask Dad for the money and that would be pointless, but they ragged on me anyway. I got pissed off and walked off the bus with the curling contraption dangling from my hair and stormed up a country road. Somewhere during my walk I came across my "Boyfriend" who was the werewolf guy from "Twilight" and he didn't have his shirt on. Apparently all the boys were going through werewolf transformation in the town and they were all walking out of their houses and taking their shirts off to go be werewolves.


I apparently lived in a big farm house in a small town called "Whalen" but I felt like a visitor and had never been to any of the businesses in town. I went walking around and small vintage shop with quirky owner who was an old lady with long, blonde, frizzy hair and a younger gay guy named "Octavio". The shop was full of weird junk and vintage clothing and was where all the freaky kids shopped. There was a yellow t-shirt attached to the front door with an iron-on square with a picture of a cat running by a bunch of trees. On the back of the t-shirt it said in red marker "If you want this shirt, you have no business shopping here."


In the shop I found a beaded flowers in amber and brown with a ring attached to it, but it was one of those things you attach to your wine stem to identify your glass. I put it on as a finger ring though and paired it with a bracelet made out of wooden tusks dyed turquoise. In the shop there were also a number of boxes on the ground and platters everywhere that contained various breads, muffins, and cheesecakes. The old lady told me to eat whatever I wanted so I picked a slice of blueberry bread. The lady thought I was super cool for creating the ring/bracelet combo and wanted to hang out with me and so did Octavio but he had a date, so I invited them the next day to my family's traditional "Naked Lunch" and told them to come naked, but in my head I knew it wasn't actually a lunch where people were naked, it had something to do with the food being raw. So it was a mean joke on my part that I didn't really mean to pull but I did anyway.

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